Don’t stop believing in love

2020 is going to be an interesting one for us! Lots of good with the bad, but I need the good and events to weigh out the bad. I am beyond thankful to the places and people not giving up on me. You are my spark of light in the darkness and I won’t let you down, but please know not everyday is easy, just as not every day is super dark. It’s a rollercoaster some days, but when I have events to go to, people that drop in, or shoot you a message to ask how you are, that’s priceless. I feel the love and I thank you for it.

I’ve been called brave, strong, a faker, an attention seeker. I am none of these. I am simply human, living with and dealing with a chronic and terminal illness, but please don’t give up on me. I still hear hateful rumors. I can’t stop people from believing what they want. Perhaps it makes them feel better if it doesn’t exist. Perhaps they can justify their actions and words by telling themselves it’s all for attention. Oh, how I wish this was true. You have no idea how badly I wish this wasn’t happening. You have no idea how badly it hurts to ‘prove’ you’re sick to those that once called you friend or family, and even when you show them over and over, they roll their eyes and delete you out of their life.

And yet, people can be so incredibly kind and compassionate. We are capable of so much love as human beings. So much love to give. It’s truly limitless and in an abundance all around us. I’m trying my hardest to spread the love I still have, because I feel like I have a plethora of it to give. Love. It doesn’t cost a thing.

I’m going to post this image from my family doctors office today. This isn’t from my explosion of specialists, this isn’t my Encyclopedia of a medical file... This is just a brief and quick rundown/print off of a few things... life changing, altering things. Don’t be sad. Be proactive! Fight for the cures with me! Love those that are dying! You think it’s hard on you? It’s harder on them.

Also, those are my feet today. 😂 Biscuits exploding with edema becasue my heart is having some fits and battling with circulation. No, it’s not made up. Nope, not in my head. I’m standing up for myself. I’m not going to allow the nay sayers and haters to put me down further than I already am. No, I’m going to do what I always do and push like a mo-fo! I’m booking my calendar up for the season. Yes, I’ll be on stage and a guest at events, even if I’m dying and under 100 pounds, and you know what, that’s freaking amazing! Ahhhhmazing! Don’t stop believing in yourself.

Just because others want to see you fail, doesn’t mean you stop pushing and give up. You fight even harder, harder than you’ve ever fought in your life. You’re fighting for love. Don’t stop believing in love. ❤️

Kandi